Wherever you go, there you are.
I know you’ve probably heard this one before. Let me expand on the meaning of this for me. Today, I was talking with a friend and he’s going through a difficult time. He said he feels like he has no choice and he’s not in control.
I told him this:
You live where you put yourself. (tweet this)
I know; kinda profound, huh? I told him this trying to explain that he is in control and he can make choices and that he feels the way he feels is because has “put himself there.”
Well, that statement actually hit me right between the eyes later when I realized that I had been thinking the same thing. You see, I’ve been trying to figure something out lately and I’ve been feeling like I’m also without choices and it’s weighing heavily on me. I actually said “I don’t really have any choice.” AND I believed it. Meh.
Read it again: You live where you put yourself. Hmmm…here’s an add on: I put myself in places I don’t want to be more often than I’d like to admit.
What does it all mean? For me, it means that we ARE in charge of what happens to us. I get the whole “whoa is me, my life is out of control and everyone else is doing so much better” thing going and it’s NOT a fun or productive place to be.
Guess what? It’s not true. We ARE in control and we always have choices. When you’re waiting for something to happen or someone to love you or your life to get better, you are giving away the control. AND it’s not even really about control, but knowing that you make it what you think it’ll be. If you think that someone else has all the decision to love you or not and you wait, then you’re right, they do. AND what’s even worse is that you gave it to them. Same holds for your happiness and work and so many other facets of your life.
I love mixed martial arts and coaches of fighters say “Don’t leave the decision up to the judges.” That means fight your ass off, get what you want out of life and don’t let someone else control the outcome.
Listen, life is not all peaches and cream and we go through ups and downs and you do have choices and say so in what happens and how you react/act. Make it the best every day and get out of your own way.
Being happy is a choice and you can decide to do that…or wait.
The decision is yours.